How to accept that my car won't ever be "perfect"?

[heinzboehmer]

Also, whenever I start worrying about cosmetics, I think about the car in this video: https://youtu.be/1h-9oOogD4E

It's a great reminder that something can be cool as shit without looking perfect.

[heinzboehmer]

I guess for me half the fun of this car is that there's always something to do on it, something to plan, something to research, something to make better.

Every time I think to myself that it might be nice to have a late model Porsche or something I realise that having the nice shiny thing isn't actually what I want, it's the satisfaction of of the effort I put into it that I enjoy.

I guess what I'm saying is that I'm afraid that if I reach “perfect” I'd lose interest in it…


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+1000

For me, half the fun is breaking stuff and finding ways to fix it. Usually end up learning something new every time there's a novel failure.

[karter16]

I guess for me half the fun of this car is that there's always something to do on it, something to plan, something to research, something to make better.

Every time I think to myself that it might be nice to have a late model Porsche or something I realise that having the nice shiny thing isn't actually what I want, it's the satisfaction of of the effort I put into it that I enjoy.

I guess what I'm saying is that I'm afraid that if I reach “perfect” I'd lose interest in it…


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[cobra]

This is such a wonderful topic, I'm glad you shared your thoughts MTiz - I continuously look at the imperfections: that one dent that one time I didn't park close far enough from that SUV in my building, the 3rd gear synchro that some previous owner left for me to enjoy until I rebuild the transmission, the lack of a paint correction on the car, how my driver seat leather is starting to tear at the seam, how my steering wheel and shift knob desperately need their leather refreshed, etc. etc. I try to remind myself that a cream puff of one of these was never something I wanted: If I had a cream puff, I wouldn't drive it in the canyons, and would never take it out on day to day runs, I would be too nervous to do so.

I still park in the last parking spot in any parking lot, and I don't think the anxiety that comes along with loving your car so much will ever go away, but I guess that's something we all have to live with.

cobra I swear I'll print your post out and re-read it from time to time, I'll remember that one, thanks for that

No problem. It's worth being conscious of because it's easy to relapse into thinking you can control everything. I could go on and on

[Nate047]

Feeling this majorly right now, "manage expectations" are the two words I find myself coming back to. I don't have any philosophical advice, but just try to keep it in perspective. It's only a car. There will always be someone with a cooler, cleaner, nicer, fresher one than yours. Only you can decide how much is a healthy amount to obsess over details. If you're not careful, you'll drive yourself mad and come to uncomfortable conclusions if you try to compare your car to others too much.

Also, let's not forget about the whole unattainable beauty standards on social media thing. It's like, think of all the flaws on your car as Cindy Crawford's mole. Some of those cars are really really insane in person, sure. But those are relatively serious money cars, sometimes with $80-$100k+ and a year or two (or more) into the builds. That is definitely cool, and it's great that people do that, but that doesn't mean you have to. Plus those guys are going to have a heart attack if a bird shits on their car.

[Estoril]

Answer this question: "Perfect for what???"

[Icecream]

This is something I struggle with, not just with the M3, but life in general. I call it the 'fallacy of permanence' and is an internal struggle about the inability to accept that nothing good lasts forever. Conversely, nothing bad lasts forever either, which is the bright side of it.

It sounds like you're enjoying your car more than most people with this mindset. We're not here forever so might as well have fun.

Agreed though, on some level, if nothing good lasts forever then, by default, bad does...

Internet philosophy aside, it shouldn't leak, clunk or really rattle with a little work. Most of those things are easy to fix and will make a huge difference. Some new trim, door clips and tightening screws goes a long long way towards this kind of stuff as does all new suspension bits and good tires. Just those items alone will set it apart from a ratty sh*tbox.

[ChapterM3]

This is such a wonderful topic, I'm glad you shared your thoughts MTiz - I continuously look at the imperfections: that one dent that one time I didn't park close far enough from that SUV in my building, the 3rd gear synchro that some previous owner left for me to enjoy until I rebuild the transmission, the lack of a paint correction on the car, how my driver seat leather is starting to tear at the seam, how my steering wheel and shift knob desperately need their leather refreshed, etc. etc. I try to remind myself that a cream puff of one of these was never something I wanted: If I had a cream puff, I wouldn't drive it in the canyons, and would never take it out on day to day runs, I would be too nervous to do so.

I still park in the last parking spot in any parking lot, and I don't think the anxiety that comes along with loving your car so much will ever go away, but I guess that's something we all have to live with.

cobra I swear I'll print your post out and re-read it from time to time, I'll remember that one, thanks for that

[MTiz]

This has been on my mind a lot lately. Mostly the cosmetic side of things, like bumper sag, rock chips, etc. It is kind of tiring to think of. I love my M3, maybe a little too much ha. I don’t how to get over this mindset and be perfectly content with minor imperfections.

Short story time-- last July, right after my birthday, a tree fell on the M3 right outside of my downtown apartment. Insurance paid out over $6k worth of damages, I paid $500 bucks out of pocket, and most of my car got resprayed. For a long while I was afraid to drive it anywhere until I could set aside some cash to get it PPF'd. Completely paranoid about getting rock chips. Long story short I ended up getting a couple of rock chips anyway and now I can enjoy the car again lol. I'm still going to get that PPF thrown on at some point but to your point, we have to find enjoyment in the imperfection.

[MTiz]

This is something I struggle with, not just with the M3, but life in general. I call it the 'fallacy of permanence' and is an internal struggle about the inability to accept that nothing good lasts forever. Conversely, nothing bad lasts forever either, which is the bright side of it.

It sounds like you're enjoying your car more than most people with this mindset. We're not here forever so might as well have fun.

I think if I was rich I'd probably have it restored from the ground up, or better yet just buy an ultra-low mileage cream puff from EAG or something. But for now, I just fix what I can and what is most important, and try to maximize my behind-the-wheel time as much as possible .

[MotorSportThree]

This has been on my mind a lot lately. Mostly the cosmetic side of things, like bumper sag, rock chips, etc. It is kind of tiring to think of. I love my M3, maybe a little too much ha. I don’t how to get over this mindset and be perfectly content with minor imperfections.

[cobra]

This is something I struggle with, not just with the M3, but life in general. I call it the 'fallacy of permanence' and is an internal struggle about the inability to accept that nothing good lasts forever. Conversely, nothing bad lasts forever either, which is the bright side of it.

It sounds like you're enjoying your car more than most people with this mindset. We're not here forever so might as well have fun.

[MTiz]

Did anyone else come to the conclusion that their car will never be mechanically perfect, "factory fresh" so to speak?

For a little backstory I just passed 3 years of ownership and 30k+ hard miles. I've dailied this car, done rallys, slammed back roads, drifted it, hell I even drove it across the country from MD to Cali and I'll probably drive it back when I'm done out here lol. I've done everything except a real track day at this point which I'm hoping to get in this year.

At 170k+ miles though, trying to make the car perfect is just a losing battle. Between age (ole girl is almost 20!), my heavy right foot , and a budget that is not unlimited (///M tax) it will simply never happen. We've got clunks, we've got leaks, and we've got rattles. We fix one thing and another thing pops up. But old girl can still get up and go, and I think I'm happy with that.