This is my Dilemma

[Hans_VanLoch]

It was a wonderful 3.5 hour drive home. I took a bag of tools and my 18s, and swapped out for my winter tires, sending the others home with my other driver.

It's amazing how beautifully these cars drive, even on 40 degree rainy days. I've owned very few things whose final result was so close to its original philosophy of design...

I think the one thing that would allow me to sell it is just how intense it is to drive. You feel like you're making the car work too hard if you shift before 4k rpm, but above that, the sensory output of the engine creates a sense of urgency in the mind that either must come out as rip-roaring behavior or internalized as pent up energy. Cruising at 3k rpm is peace and bliss (especially when you're comparing it to a freeway cruise in a straight-pipe Dodge Cummins), but to get there is either going to be 'a little too fun' or a little mentally taxing.

The perfect solution is to keep the car purely for fun - to drive it on days when the intention is nothing BUT that sensory experience. And yet.... I have only two garage stalls, and I'm in the garage all the time. Will the joy of the car's beauty outweigh the mental weight of owning a car that I drive maybe a dozen times a year?

Ahh, time will tell. I have no answers. I do know that I've made a lot of memories in 60k miles. Some are memories I'd rather forget (times of poor behavior; not with driving, but the person I was for a little while). Other memories are deeply moving to me and I love the way being in the car brings them all back - so many adventures with my kids and I!

Well: thanks for the space to think and feel out loud. Peace be with you all.

[Hans_VanLoch]

PS - Part of what it all comes down to, I think, is YOUTH.

I used to get p---d when people would say 'mid life crisis car.' The truth, obvious to me, was that responsible men with healthy priorities simply waited until it was prudent to do what they'd always wanted to do.

Yet as a 37 year old on the other side of a major health crisis, I think I get it now in a way that 34 year old Hans VanLoch - bulletproof, agile, strong, dare I say attractive - just couldn't understand.

Now, I see the car as like a 'horcrux' or whatever (from Harry Potter) - an object that I deposited so much of my youthful vitality into that, even now, it radiates it. The memories, yes, but the real energy; the smell, the feeling....

I age. My wife ages. My kids age terrifyingly fast. And the car ages too, but parts can be swapped and the driving experience has actually only ever increased from 50k miles to 109k; it's a far better car than it was then in every discernable way.

The car is Forever Young.

Does it distract me from important lessons and acceptances that I should be integrating at age 37?

Or does it help me to retain something that I very much should never allow myself to lose?

Again..... I have no answers.


God bless ye merry gentlemen.

[ugaexploder]

Well written man, I think we would all be lying if we didn't feel a similar sentiment when it comes to this car. Sounds like you got yourself a keeper though

[CrisSilberGrau]

Ooofff hitting the feels a bit too early in the AM. Youth... Ffs

[maw1124]

Yes, the car is a bit high strung, which is its charm... a welcome departure at times from my usual sedate Benz driving... which is of course why I keep it around, just to mix things up a bit... I bought it when I was a little older than you actually... now in my 50's it's just clean fun... kids grew up in these cars, learned to drive on these cars (except the S55 which scared them)... this one I think they like the most because small, fun, top down, etc.

maw

[simonnim]

Unless you need the money or space. Just stuff it away and take it out at night time when the kids are sleeping. That what I do. Occasionally the track on a blue blue blue blue blue moon.

[Stilt]

Can we see some pics of the car, my curiosity has been piqued lol. 😂


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Hans_VanLoch]

Ha! Nothing special, especially to any purist M3 enthusiasts: my car is a black on black vert. Intentionally chosen! I sought the wind; the noise; the freedom of a convertible. And I'm very pleased that I did.

Otherwise, it appears totally stock, even the wheels are stock. Yet I have put a very great deal into the mechanicals and suspension; of course it's had the subframe reinforced; VANOS; rod bearing, all done by the reputable Alex of Perf Euro in Chicago. Engine wise: airbox, cam, SS headers and all sections; Alpha-N, etc etc. All suspension components replaced, every bushing, etc etc.

Ahh, she's a fine car. Very high strung, as someone above said very well. But what a glorious machine.

[Nate047]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d-k96zKa_4w

[Nate047]

The age thing, I'm about your same age and I feel the sentiment. I would not get rid of the car. It sounds like you are a man of at least reasonable means, so maybe just register it non op and find an indoor parking space you can rent, and just leave it for a while. Spot Hero, Spot Finder, etc... I can't imagine what it's like to have 5 friggin kids lol but maybe one of them will want it someday, if nothing else.

[Hans_VanLoch]

Aside from the disgusting fact that the guy in the TLC video refers to his car as a 'he,' the irony is that my first real car was a Monte Carlo - hahah.

Five kids is bliss; a glimpse of Heaven itself.

Happy 2024, lads.